Friday, 9 September 2011

Catherine Krog's Murder: What It Taught Me

Catherine Krog's murder on Thursday shocked us all to the core. But it was a suddenly very public exposure of a serious injustice. The Judicial and Social system let down Catherine, Bella and yes, even Bella's Mother and Ex. Evidence supports how both adults were pushed to their limits - and one of the adults snapped.

Beyond reason.
Beyond any rationale.
Beyond hope.

Catherine's life was snuffed out too soon, smothered in heartbroken seething rage and insanity. Little Bella will have to bear the truth and live out her life with the knowledge of her parent's feuding, I just hope and pray that she is raised with strong sense of self worth and that she will understand that above all else, her Mother loved her, till death.

I was told details of the murder suicide but decided not to publish them out of respect to Catherine and Bella. Some things are best kept private and I'm saddened to see the media having a field day with this story. Sensationalism sells it seems - we accept this. Perhaps that is why I am a blogger and not a journo.

In life, when we choose a partner, and then have children with that partner it can be an incredibly heartbreaking and disturbing mess when things don't work out. Men steal their children, Women refuse access, Men threaten, Women manipulate: we are awful to one another. There will never be a clear cut answer, I only implore:

-Be WISE in your choices.
-Be KIND in your actions.
-Be TRUTHFUL in your relationships.

I also offer my sympathy to Catherine's family - also to her Mother. When a Mother and Daughter don't see eye to eye there is always SO much hurt and anger, words unsaid. Words twisted by the media.

I hope that the countless people affected by Cat's death find comfort. I know that it has affected me deeply, I am hugging my children tighter, squeezing my husband's hand. Using Catherine's sad passing as a lesson to love as fiercely as she did.

Sandy Bigara


  1. Well said Sandy- it's also good to renember that there are always more than two sided to a story.
    It is a tragic for a little girl to hAve lost both her parents in such circumstances bit maybe there's a way for her to have a fresh start in life with no drama. Love is not enough. Children need stability and protection as well as love. Perhaps Bella will have that and she will grow up un a very different life now than what was previously on offer. There are many twists and turns on lifes road. I really hope Bella is surrounded by parenting angels - God says that widows and orphans belong to him, and my own experience is that children can survive and even thrive In such circumstance. Let's pray that Bella and the thousands of orphans around the world get guardian parenting angels in their lives and God guides, heals and protects each one

  2. It's great to read a fair, balanced & objective view of this tragic situation.
    Most people have neither the time nor the inclination to delve deeper & get the facts, apart from the Facebook page or YOU magazine article. All I can say is, this could have been prevented.
    Visit to see damage & trauma caused by those experiencing high conflict divorces.

  3. so so true.... for once both sides are seen..... Bella needed stability and routine, hopefully she will get that now. Bella will rise above this and be the best she can, as she will be cared and loved for by so many. Bella has been given another chance to live a better life. May God bless her and keep her safe forever and ever.....


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