Thursday, 18 August 2011

Cockroach Infestation... ?

You know that tropical South African summer is coming, when you start to *see* Cockroaches everywhere... Even when there aren't any there. You *see* them nonetheless. (I'm talking about the flying one's that fly in your windows... If you have the live-in ones then... sies! Clean your house! Jiss!)

In my case it is not cockroaches that I'm seeing but rather, imposters. In my case, my house is infested it seems, with little black, scurrying feathers. Yes. My daughter Savanna has been gallavanting around wearing my black feather boa again.

It's not funny!
I reach for my shoe!
My eyes ferret around feverishly looking for the rusty can of insect spray.
You've done it too.
Don't judge me.

And so, tomorrow after our interview with 'Tape Aids' (we may be recording my shows and novel onto CD for the blind) and before my newspaper interview (for my novel - I am SO excited) I will scramble around on all fours searching for these hybrid cockroach-feathers.

Because mark my words, one day soon there will actually *be* a cockroach, and it will most probably land up running up my trousers/pants because I don't kill it immediately.

Be warned: cockroaches are evil mastermind's and are super intelligent, don't be fooled by their size. If the A-bomb went off... THEY would still be here; and you, would be cinders. They are into fashion, they just *love* trousers/pants and will aim for YOUR trousers/pants, IF you don't end their reign of terror: with lightening quick reflexes - and the precision of a hooded viper.

I have had cockroaches run up my pants not once, not twice, nay...THRICE (That's three. Foohl.) Up. My. pant legs... I cannot describe the horror of having one of those 'things' shimmying up the bottom half of your Pj's *shivers*

In other words, I don't muck around. I get them before they can get to ME.

So, hopefully after tomorrow I will have located and dispatched ALL black feathers and will resume 'Roach Watch 2011' with peace of mind... Gah!

Sandy Bigara

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