Wednesday, 19 December 2007

The Problem with Automated Response…

My Husband Franc, in a fit of fervent, prosperous, holiday fever, sent off a response to an inviting SMS declaring…


So, being the gorgeous blue eyed sweetie pie that he is… he sent off that first, inevitable, innocent, R10 per SMS…um,…SMS. This is what followed.

After sending off the word “YEBO” (meaning ‘yes’ in zulu) to the number provided (and spending R10 in a split second) he sat back and smiled thinking of how he would drive that BMW… before he knew it he received this…

"Vodacom celebrates 100 cars! Win 1 of 100 BMW’s in 100 days!1 BMW every day! SMS your NAME to 555101and win 30 extra entries in tonight’s draw! (R10 per SMS)"

…and so, like any hot blooded BMW inspired cell phone user… he SMS’d his name, FRANCIS to the number provided and, once again, spent R10 in a split second.
Once again, he sat back and smiled thinking of how well spent the R20 was, when, suddenly, he heard what was the start of an interesting journey into the world of


He had sent off his first SMS at 7:05
He had received the second SMS at 7:06
He replied at 7:06
At 7:06 he received this message…

"TIP 1: Every SMS you send to 555101 is worth 10 extra entries in the DAILY draw. IMPORTANT: All the SMS you receive are free. Reply now! (R10 per SMS)"

…at 7:07 he received another SMS…

"TIP 2: You are not alone! You’ll find surprises, bonus’s, even EXTRA CARS!! Let’s start! There’s a surprise for you TODAY! SMS YEBO to 555101 (R10 per SMS)"

… in disbelief (hello! he received like 100 SMS in ONE MINUTE) then after a brief respite, at 7:15 he received this message…

"With 1 SMS a day you can transfer all your entries to the daily BMW draw Francis! Play now for more bonuses! SMS YEBO to 555101 (R10 per SMS)"

…he called me and read the SMS to me as yet another one came through, also at 7:15…

"Hey Francis! We have a question for YOU! SMS YEBO to 55510. Once you have answered it you will get 70 extra entries!! (R10 per SMS)"

…after a few minutes of amazement, at 7:25 he received yet another SMS…

"IF you would rather QUIT and not receive any tips or free info SMS STOP to 555101, don’t worry we’ll still enter you into today’s draw! (R10 per SMS)"

We then had a respite and almost forgot the experience until the next morning, when Vodacom stepped up the game 12:14 17th December…

"Hi Francis! P. Mokebi won yesterdays BMW draw…"
Now pay attention because this is where automated response systems fail us.
"…but today’s BMW may be won by a WOMAN. If you would like to enter today’s draw - SMS YEBO to 555101 (R10) GO FOR IT!"

He frowned and asked me, why are they telling that a WOMAN might win?
I shrugged. Then on the 17:23 18th December…

"Important reminder Francis! Don’t forget to transfer all of your 60 entries for tonights BMW draw. SMS YEBO… blah blah…"
(Just wanna mention that it has now gone from 30 entries to 60 entries magically)

Then, we realised what had happened when, on the 19th December at 17:01 we received this last SMS… hahaha…

"Come on Francis! Girls never quit and Quitters never win! Claim the BMW! Transfer your 60 entries now! (R10 per SMS)"

Someone, Somewhere, decided that it would be a great idea to not only have customers names attached to propaganda SMS chains, but that it would be fun to assign GENDER based on NAME. Someone at Vodacom has not yet realised that FRAN – CIS is a male name, and FRAN – CES is a girls name.

Come on Francis my man! You GO GIRL!!!


Thursday, 13 December 2007

The Snow Patrol Experience...

I had the pleasure today, of babysitting the gorgeous and famous Snow Patrol Swan. No it's not a swan, it's mommy and daddy are 'the Swans' Kim and Paul...Swan... ok. Got it.

Well, this little noonoo is at present chilling out in Aunty Sandy's old hamster cage, while it's parents decide if they like their baba with or without feathers...the jury is still out on that one but i'm sure Kim will keep us posted on her blog! until then, he is one cool dude with a funky cage and his own mirror and what-not... Kim and I took out the hamster wheel... it's lying in my dusty garage...

He has spent the day, Sitting, Sh*tting, Sleeping, Flying up and crash landing, Crawling all over his mirror, Eating and Staring at his room mate...

Kim dropped the little tyke off this morning and I put Hannibal our Finch next to him (in his own cage of course!)
Now Mr Hannibal has his own story - he has had two wives,...yes TWO WIVES since we got him a year ago.
After the Second Mrs Hannibal J Finch died of the SAME problem we realised that there was a suspicious link between Mrs Hannibal J Finch 1 and Mrs Hannibal J Finch 2... ie. MURDER.
Of the extreme feather plucking kind... (I hear him now "But I like's them brazillian waxed mr Judge!!")

Well, from being really reserved and quiet, little SP has become steadily more vocal... I think the fact that Hannibal has been enticing him closer, with promises of a life of luxury in his penthouse nest has helped... what a wierd finch.

I managed to sneak up (can 8 month pregnant ladies sneak?) and catch a bad shot of them as they realised that i was there.... anyway, they have spent the day chattering back and forth and hopping around on the ground floor...
This is the shot.
Hannibal J Finch - Left, Snow Patrol Swan who is a Budgie - Right.

Tuesday, 11 December 2007

Our Garden Again...

This is our darling porch.

The paved area on the right sits on top of a retainer wall that my husband built. It is very pretty - log rolls, and added an extra metre onto our existing porch.
We are going to finish the fence along the top soon and enclose our porch for when little Savanna Rae makes her appearance.
I must say, love this addition to our little porchie, it makes it feel like a small italian villa - I love the soft greens of the ground cover coming through the paving stones. yummo! When we sit in our lounge we can only see to the end of this section and then we look straight into the branches of our stunning Ficus Tree.

This is our bank.

The top left is the retainer wall and the start of our porch.
The middle shows our bottom entertainment area (waiting to be paved) and our Ficus tree.
Our very bohemian lounge is level with the middle of it's branches.
This pic was taken at the beginning of spring - our garden is very brightly coloured now and the tree is in full sprig - nice!

This is our bird bath and the top of our stairs.

The small round bush on the left is at the top of our stairs going down to our bottom entertainment area - there is a matching bush on the other side of the steps.
The small bird feeder has a funny story...our black maltese Oscar, doesn't like his paws geting wet... so when we've had a heavy dew fall or rain - he runs as fast as he can and jumps up into the water bowl... I think he hopes that it is not full... funny dog.

This is the flower bed near our bedroom window.
It is now full of flowering plants. Pansies, Dianthus and Selenium to name a few. It was the last garden patch that I planted before my tummy got too big! I love my garden and all the beautiful things in it!
Our little leopard tree is growing beautifully and its hard to believe that it was just a little seed in Francs hand once!

Will add some more pics another time :)

Monday, 3 December 2007

Interesting Info...

This is how big my baby girl Savanna is, it is hard to believe! No wonder i'm exhausted!!

Birth plans and being informed

Your rights during labour

Secrets to a more comfortable labour

What to pack in your hospital bag

For a personalized Pregnancy Calendar

Birthing Traditions

An incredible video - a animation of how the baby grows and is delivered (not gruesome!)

The Law of Murphy Regarding Baba's...

The minute you've fully dressed your baby, she will poop.
There are other Murphy's Laws of Parenting. Perhaps you too have found your life governed by the following:
Upon removal of the baby's bib, even after baby has burped, the baby will inevitably spit up.
Hand-me-down outfits stay perfectly clean. New ones are spit up on.
Corollary #1: The more the outfit cost, the more the baby will spit up on it.
Corollary #2: If mother is wearing a ratty old T-shirt, not a drop of drool will come out of baby's mouth. If mother puts on a new cashmere sweater, whammo!
If baby has been an absolute angel all day while alone with mother, baby will fuss and cry the minute a play date begins.
The baby will sleep when mother needs her to be awake (like during a music class or when someone has dropped by to see the precious one) and stay awake when mother needs baby to be asleep (for instance, at 10pm when mother wants to go to bed).
Baby shall always achieve a new milestone, such as rolling over onto her tummy, the minute mother leaves the room. Someone else will witness it, in order that mother may be told how great it was and what a shame it was that she missed it.
TAKEN FROM :,,7lfjdswm,00.html
by Jennifer Saltiel

The Thing with Pregnant Ladies…

You see, I am nearing 33 weeks pregnancy… for those of you who are a part of the “what blinkin’ month ARE you in??” let me explain…

We are not – as is commonly taught in all schools – pregnant for 9 months.
We are actually pregnant for 10 x 4week months – we give birth at the start of the 10th x4week month.
SO technically we are pregnant for 10 FULL 4 week months.
Now, by month I do not mean a CALENDAR month – I mean a 4 week month.(enough repetition here?)

So, we are preggers for 10 x 4 weeks ok…

Now, with regards to CALENDAR months – we are preggers for 9 FULL calendar months. In my case I was ‘lekker ge-pomped’ and conceived on the 8th of May, so let’s count it together now…
8th May…
1. 8th June
2. 8th July
3. 8th August
4. 8th September
5. 8th October
6. 8th November
7. 8th December
8. 8th January
Due Date : January 27th
So technically, yes, I am due inside of the 8th calendar month but I am a mere 3 days short of February which would be…let me hear it? NINE MONTHS. Or as we in the pregnancy state call it “40 weeks pregnant”

Confused? Me too.

The Lounge Wall Phenomenon…

We had a dining room and a lounge.
We had a gaping hole between them.
We got a huge piece of board.
We stuck it in the hole.
We nailed it in.
We polyfiller’d it.
We coated the house in polyfiller dust.
We primed it.
We undercoated it.
We painted it.

We have a lounge now.
We have a third bedroom now.
Case closed.
See photo’s for details. (will put them in later  )

Friday, 16 November 2007

Love is Still Love, Even in the 1300's

I've just read something beautiful - I hope that it touches you too...

I got it from Softpedia -

"Another mummy was discovered with a love poem written by a bereaved wife. The verse, written in about the same age with the Shakespearian story of Romeo and Julieta, also bears an amazing similarity to the Italian tragedy.

"You always said we would be living together, to die in the same day
However, why did you go to the heaven alone?
Why did you go alone leaving me and our child behind?
I cannot live without you anymore.
I hope I could be with you.
Please let me go with you.
My love to you, it is unforgettable in this world,
and my sorrow, it is without end."

It seems that the mummy belongs to a 32-year-old man, the second son of a nobleman involved in a revolt against the emperor. 13 letters and slippers woven from the wife's hair, were found near his mummy.

His widow probably fled with her children to the safety of her own family, fearing the imperial retribution."

Taken from:

Doesn't it just show you that love is always the same? From generation to generation. We think that we are original and "know" love... my heart is sad for this poor wife...

Sands xx

The Four Trucks on a Bridge Story

Ok, so my tum is getting bigger; and the thought of cutting hair off of a miniscule, black, highly strung Maltese/French poodle, is less appealing daily.
I opted for a hair cut ala Scissors and Suds in Pinetown, doggy parlour. I dropped off my drooling, shivering, stressed out poochie at 9:00am and headed off for some grocery shopping.

At about 10:20 I headed back to fetch said mutt, and observed a strange occurrence… The road leading to the parlour (Underwood Road) is straight and narrow...and goes over a river – via an even narrower bridge.
While I was mindlessly ambling around Knowles, there came four trucks travelling at dubiously high levels of speed (Add to this equation heavy rain, road works at the right side of the bridge, gravel, testosterone and bad time-management) and what do you get? That’s right kids – you get a “Op-ge-ferk’de Crash on a Narrow Bridge”

By the time I arrived to fetch Oscar there was:

“One road a-closing,
Two workers laughing,
Three drivers screaming,
Four trucks a-smoking, ‘
Five policemen shouting,
All traffic slowing,
Seven tow-trucks racing,
Eight gooolden riiiingsss….”
(Sorry Christmas is in my blood these days)

They were closing the road as I watched helplessly – I was about 50m from my dog at this point…I stuck my head out of the window and yelled at one of the men –
“Move that beacon please I need to park here!!..” pointing at the verge near the accident. He thankfully thought that I lived there…So lady muck parked right at the scene of the rhyme, I mean, crime, and walked like a maharaja past the accident, with my bright orange and pink ‘hearts’ umbrella, dodging glass and angry men to fetch my dog.

After paying up, one of the parlour ladies carried my Oscar all the way back to my car – I weaved my way through the twisted metal, oil, swearing and tears to my car.

What an adventure! Oh, and Oscar looks great 

Sands xx

Sunday, 11 November 2007

My Pretty Garden

Here are some nice pictures from my garden. I am just LOVING this season. Luckily I took the advice of Savanna's Gransie and planted some beautiful flowering plants. It has made all the difference.
These are our new Dianthus - I love them - They are planted in "Poppa's Garden" in the background here you can see my lovely wild fig tree. Love it!

I love this shot - it is a close up of one of the flowerbeds. Unfortunately minutes after taking this shot a troup of monkeys came through and ate the focal point of this picture... rrr. (See monkey posts)

Saturday, 10 November 2007

Our Babies Room – the Division in the House…

No, we’re not fighting… Francis is putting up a Divider, turning our Diningroom/Study into a third bedroom. And our tiny dark second room into a music studio/study. It’s so exciting because we want to have more than one little munchkin and the new room is spacious and light – it will fit a bunker set and two kids comfortably.

The house is filled with the sound of sawing and self praising comments like “ah, thank god it fits…good show” from my gorgeous hub and Skippi our mutt barking her head off.


(The partition is up and looks stunning! Our baby finally has a room! Will post a picture of the completed paritioning soon)
Tomorrow a nice guy called Joel (who we hope doesn’t work for a crime syndicate) will be coming in to fit and hang our new solid wooden doors. The ones we have now were subject to the previous owners’ abuse and are being sent to door heaven to rest in pieces. (The new doors are in now and it looks awesome!)

Well, we’re off to drop off a CD in Durban North now, I smell a rat and suspect the worst – My Baby Shower. See you on the flip side.

Sands xx

** My Suspisions were correct...I was pampered and spoilt... came home with a boot full of wonderful gifts :) **

The Issue with Cow Collecting…

I am a cow nut. I have a collection of over 40 stuffed cow toys, numerous cow ceramics, plates, cups, blankets, and now finally… I will teach my unborn child to love “Kooi” here is my latest purchase – her bib.
Don’t you love it?

Sands xx

That Day, on the Road, in my Blue Slippers…

Preggie brains are often the butt of many jokes – I’m usually the one laughing at myself… but this one takes the cake!

When I was about four months pregnant I had an early morning gig at school. I had to lead over 400 children in singing show pieces for a half and hour. We left home on time, and drove albeit casually to Westville where I drop my husband off at work each morning. As I was getting out of the car I looked down and noticed in horror that I was wearing my Hubba’s Blue fluffy slippers! I had to call in and tell them that I would be very late and why…

I was called “Slippers” by my HOD for the rest of the term…

Sands xx

The Problem With Bikes…

My Husband Francis and I are Bikers. In so much as he rides I scream. It’s fun.
Until little baby came along we were biking quite often and it was something we really enjoyed doing together.
(Left Mikey and Franc)
Unfortunately the time has come to sell “Mikey the Bikey” and we find ourselves at a crossroad… DO we trade him in and get a newer beefier version or do we simply sell, enjoy the extra R2000 a month in our pockets and one day get ourselves a beautiful bike that has not even been designed yet?...

At present Mikey is on the show room floor at Perry Yamaha in Umhlanga and we have test ridden two beauties – Yamaha R6 (Red and white) and the Honda CBR 600. Both were stunning and left us drooling.

Stay tuned.

Sands xx

Friday, 9 November 2007

The Blinking Dredded Christmas Season

WARNING: it is the end of the year, all teachers are at breaking point including myself, the following is an excerpt from a private mail that I sent to a friend. if I seem irrational and annoyed it's because I am SEVEN months pregnant and running around way too much.
This entry is for ALL the people in our lives who say "Teaching?? thats not stressful, you should try being in an office all day,...on facebook,...playing solitaire. THATS a real job"
Yeah, well this one's for you.

I lost the plot yesterday -
During a highly stressful, 'running out of time now' Christmas Play practice, in an outdoor open amphitheater; with gale force winds ripping my hair from my hair clips; and blowing the voices of the actors and three narrators onto the tennis courts; While choir children hollered and screamed at one another (they're supposed to be sitting quietly "but ma'am, you just can't even hear yourself over the wind! thats why we're shouting"...) a group of aftercare/homework centre children from senior primary came into the amphi and joined the fray...
They started making a HUGE noise while I was trying to work (At this point I had the entire cast on stage, the choir was running around the amphi and the grade 7 cast members were practically screaming in hysterical laughter after "drop kicking" the baby jesus like a rugby ball across the stage)

They joy of it was that there was a teacher there the whole time (I didn't see her with the aftercare kids) who, I think, just watched in tired 'end of term style' as they went ape for 30 min (until finally speaking up a minute from the bell)

I eventually stormed off-set and sat by myself.
I really won't be doing anything creative or imaginative again at School again in a hurry, there is NO support from staff - infact, I've been urged by a few teachers to quit the "silly christmas idea" because the children need to focus on work. (I am speaking on behalf of all music/drama teachers everywhere - this is not a school isolated occurance)

I am dumbfounded. How do they expect any major cultural growth/changes if they push academics/sport so hard?

I am hearing one message from HOD and principal and getting a completely different message from staff (from the general lack of support) I have to commend my HOD though, she has put up with a lot of nonsense from staff - she assured me that I would have a staff member helping at each practice but that has not been forthcoming. NOT her fault. urgh!

Also - the powers that be would not allow me to come into school early for practices because they didn't want to pay me for my time - the funny thing is that I finish work at 12:10 and all rehearsals have been from 12:10 - 12:30 each day for the past three weeks... who's the sucker here? ME. so they've got the hours out of me, with no support, no pay and high blood presure for my trouble.

I need a chocolate AND maternity leave for a year.

oh well, i've had my splurge.....thanks for listening :)

Sands xx

The Tracy Splurb

This is just a splurb, where I can :

Write about, love, swear, irritate, defame, glamorize, annoy, deride, empathize with and brag about my SISTER Tracy Margetts x enjoy

This is Tracy she's an usual animal. She enjoys Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain... no wait - that's a song.

She has a history of wierd creativity (late night candle-lit poetry readings, cooky photo-shoots, vine-swinging, VW-driving) and intermingled with love dramas and other shenanigans...her life is a book waiting to be written (if anyone can afford a Novelist/Ghost Writer : contact Tracy)


I've asked Tracy to send me some inspirational messages for all the women out there and all I got was... "Calling all single available men..." or something like that...

We'll wait and see what she sends on.

Sunday, 28 October 2007

The Drama of Monkeys Continues...

We came home yesterday after a long day out, to find that we had had a visitor...or twenty. The heavy kitchen window was hanging WIDE open and our new bread packet was lying open on the kitchen counter covered in fang marks, and nail scratches... We found our other bread packet, empty, and lying on the porch at the front of the house.
My adorable and gorgeous hubby remarked - as only Sherlock Holmes and Poirot may remark "I think we've had a little visitor"
Biting back any acidic, female, pregnant, hormonal remarks I replied,
"yeeess, seems so...think it was a monkey?"
To which my darling man replied in all seriousness,
Case closed.
Despite a few crums here and there, and the fact that our two small dogs were actually IN the kitchen at the time of the invasion we got off lightly.
No dead pets.
No stinky-monkey pooh in the bed
No torn carpets, curtains or linen.
Such focussed little critters...
Where's my gun...
Sands xx

The Shame Faced Entry...

Well, I’m rather shame faced – it has been a while since my last splurge… I have been possibly the busiest pregnant lady on the planet. I have to be. It takes full and utter confidence in one’s busy-ness to write such a statement…

I am the head honcho of a production company called Paw Paw Productions SA, I have three amazing actors working on two original scripts at the moment.
“Gangsta’s Paradise – Bullying In Our Schools” and “Stop! Look left” – Road Safety Awareness.
In January we are launching out into the local school system travelling and teaching the kids using dance, drama and interactive stimuli. I’ve been running around buying props, pricing sound systems, getting microphones, and putting together the backing track for the shows. My Actors are Leeann Devlall, Catherine Keogh and Rylen De Esclana.

I am also the head honchorina of The Bigara Music School – I have about 45 students who study piano, keyboard, guitar, voice and theory of music with me every week. This Saturday (yesterday, they had their recital) I was in heaven and ran around organising everything for the big day. About 120 parents and grandparents arrived, the children were so cute! They were so prepared and excited.
The show consisted of:
A piano performance by Mr David Sprong,
Arecital performance by the students, including an item with 16 guitars, 1 violin, one pianist and a choir of talented singers,
Followed by a speech by my special guest speaker; Mrs Gillian Robinson. Principal of Oasis Pre Primary School (and my mom!)
We ended off with the Awards ceremony, with our other special guest; Mrs Joan Bottriell handing out the awards and prizes.
The crux of the days event was the awarding of the “Super Star of Tomorrow Trophy” and the “Robert E. Bottriell Memorial Floating Trophy For Excellence”
The Super Star Trophy went to Seni Sabela and the Memorial Floating Trophy went to Daniel Francis.

Next on my agenda is the Completely Calypso Carol that I have written, Scripted, Backing tracked and organised. It is a Carribean Christmas play – lots of fun, I am getting help from the school and so it has not been too traumatic for me – being 7 months pregnant and running around is not always easy! The show will open in about 4 weeks time eek!!

Finally, we have our little baby girl Savanna Rae on her way into our lives in January and we have not even begun to prepare!! So we’re going to be doing some household alterations for when she arrives J

Ok, gotta go. Work to do…

Sands xx

Wednesday, 29 August 2007

BEE Commentary

Sandy Doherty-Bigara
28 August 2008
I am an oppo-racist meaning that I love all races. I really have no problem with each of our wonderful groups, I still hang on to Madiba’s promise of a rainbow nation but at the moment there are just too many clouds and the rainbow is vanishing... Read on and let me know if you agree.

Hearing stories like the Olympiad that was only open to black learners makes me realise that there is STILL way too much emphasis on colour in our society – now I am going to play devils advocate here and mention this fact: Has anyone watched BABEL? It really opened my eyes, the US is exactly the same as our country, the only difference is that in our country the tables have turned… and White, Coloured, Indian, Asian, Europian and Imports are on the short end of the stick while the black majority is taking stride to fill all available positions with ill-equipped correctly coloured people.

My husband is a white man, well educated, talented and 32 years old. We recently enquired of the Australian Government if our CV’s would be enough to guarantee us a Skilled Visa to their country. When they read my husband’s CV they sent an email telling him that we qualified on his merit alone and that he had an impressive CV and would be a valuable asset to their country…do you know, my husband couldn’t understand it, it took him a day or two to realise that he is actually worth employing. You see, as whites, we are slowly being conditioned to think “Ooh, that’s a nice job, I’d love to do that. Should I send in my CV? No use, it won’t be considered.” Our line of thought is then validated by the small print which reads *only BEE applicants may apply.
Is it right? No. People should be employed according to their qualifications and experience, age and suitability.

When will we speak up? When the minority groups are so squashed and despondent? When all of “our” qualified people are littered around the world using their skills to enrich other countries? Or will we only speak up when things are so bad that the minorities don’t even study any more and enter into low class existence?

There are many black people that I know personally who really deserve their employment, they have worked hard at their studies, they are focussed and determined – I have a problem when people are ill equipped and yet are employed instead of better qualified men and women of the wrong colour.

I get so angry when I see adverts offering investment opportunities, they are really exciting and guarantee an income at the end of the stipulated period, only to be told in bold writing across the page or screen, “only BEE applicants may apply” what did I do wrong that I cannot make investments? Or apply for jobs? Or consider myself worthy of employ? Something is very wrong here. Very wrong.

I have drawn a cartoon this morning to depict my view on BEE please check it out, you are free to copy it.

Sands xx

Friday, 24 August 2007

Chicken pox, chicken pox where are you?...

I arrived at work feeling very ill, and after playing the piano in front of 1000 people and consuming loads of coke to get me through I left for home.

I spent the entire day in bed and ended up calling off sick on Thursday, I thought I was getting flu but in actual fact I was sick with Varcella – Chicken Pox.

Now normally I would have just been brave and dealt with it but I am four months pregnant and it hit me like a tonne of bricks.
I was told in one moment that my unborn babies life was at risk and that there may be deformities, pneumonia etc etc. and I’ve had to just get to grips with this and deal with the ravaging of this horrible virus while going through week 17 pregnancy symptoms as well!

As I sit here now I feel a little better, my skin is healing and I am booked off work for ages. I’m only going back September 7th. I fell ill on the August 14th so it’s a long ride.

But I have faith that all will come right.

Good monkey, good monkey…

It was a Monday, 13 August 2008, I left work and went to Crompton hospital to give blood for preggy tests… I drove home in a rush, I had to pick up my pooch Oscar and take him to have stitches removed and then I had to rush off to Glenwood to fetch my husband from work. Now, at the best of times I feel shaky after blood tests and so as I arrived home I stepped from the car and noticed that there were an unusual amount of monkeys running around. As I walked nearer to our entrance (we’re the third and end house) I started to shout at the Juvies that were jumping around in front of me – I really hoped that there were no more of them near our place (my one phobia is : monkeys)
AS I turned the corner I realised with horror that there were about 20 of these monkeys right outsode my door! The alpha male was sitting on my step eating a piece of corn, the huge females were sitting next to him and they all just eyed me out.

I had no choice but to get into my house so I adopted the quieter approach (I was sure that my previous yelling would not hold much sway with Big John and his Bi-yatches.
It think it went something like this…
“Gooooood monkeys, gooooood monkeys” and a step closer,
“aaaaaaaalright gooooood monkeys” and I slowly move the open rubbish bin away from the front door.
“Oookaaay monkeys” and I open the gate – praying that they don’t crowd into my home and wreck the place.

I got inside and burst into tears. It had taken so long to get into my home that I now couldn’t take the dog for his stitches and I would be late fetching my husband!!

I stood inside crying until I got so mad I just freaked out – I got my whistle, my dog, my hand bag and my keys and burst through the back door like Jackie Chan blowing the whistle and freaking out. I kicked everything that I could see to the side, the rubbish bin, the packets, vegetables, cans, bottles, you name it - it got kicked. Our back yard looked like a trash dump!

I ended up being on time fetching my husband…a little shaken but ok.

Saturday, 4 August 2007

A Poem - By Francis Doherty-Bigara - For Sandy

May our love last forever.
May our friendship always be true.

May our feet tread the green fields,
And our lips sip the clear springs.

May our hearts always be for each other,
As we walk along life’s way.

Until hand in hand we reach the end,
And we have seen the best of our days.

All my love always,

A Poem - by Francis Doherty-Bigara - Lesson One

To my Child

A flower has petals and a tree has branches
Who you are is not the clothing you wear
But the beauty people must see

The paint on a canvass tells a thousand words
And the story of your life is written in the pictures of your past

Do good, be holy, live life, be free
Cry when you must
Laugh when you can
Rise, fall, try, fail, succeed
Live life, be free.

A moon needs the night sky
As the sunrise needs the horizon

Your soul needs Jesus as water quenches dry land
Each day has its blessings
As every action has its consequence

For everything that has a beginning will eventually have an end
Lions don’t try to fly and birds don’t roar

Mountains aren’t plains and plains aren’t seas
It will suffice that you be all you can be

Love, Dad

Saturday with Mom and Tee

Sandy Doherty-Bigara

Today, i drove to the pav and met up with my mom and sister, we walked around for ages and then bought a pair of stunning cargoes for me (the tum is getting bigger all the time!!)
We ended up having a burger, tramezini and some ice-cream - oh yes, and three mango juices (the straw stands up in them) it was nice.

Then I stole Tee, and we headed home, mow we're watching Peter Sellers "the Party" and I'm typing this :)

Sands xx

Friday, 3 August 2007

My August Week

Sandy Doherty-Bigara
Friday, 3 Aug,
Exerpt taken from my pregnancy chats:

Ok, ok…it’s time for my weekly “what happened in my life this week” splurb…
Mmm, let’s see, apart from a few horrendous monkey problems life’s been quiet. Oh wait, I’m dreaming… this is what happened;

Monday: went to work way to early, got home really late found that my maltese and fox terrier had escaped the kitchen and left lovely doggy scented brown parcels all over the house for me to find. How kind of them. They also had played hide-and-go-seek with most of my socks. I tidied up, got over the disgust and then made really yummy cottage pie.

Tuesday: worked way to hard again and then went to the Pavilion Shopping mall to buy some more maternity stuff because these days I wear a sign – ‘Sandy’s belly is expanding at present, we apologise for any inconvenience during these necessary alterations’
I ended up walking about 6 kilometers – eating a huge plate of chips with my man, hunting high and low for toilets (they are also being altered at present) and then ended up buying stunning fabric so that I can sew three new preggy skirts and transform my fave denims and tracksuits into preggy wear. Ended up at home late, at too much and went to bed.

Wednesday: Up at the bleeding crack of dawn. Led a singing practice with over 400 children, fought the glares of killer vervet monkeys all the way back to my room (about 1 km) taught hectically loud drama lessons, did all of the audio for a show rehearsal, oh yes!!!!! I got crapped on by a sacred ibis!! These birds are HUGE – bigger than most medium sized dogs. They crap about 500g /half a kg of scrambled earthworm crap at a time… this one was sitting directly above me in the 200year old tree above the open amphitheatre… well, it crapped good and proper. On top of the CD player – the shit flew sideways landing all over my face, shirt and down both black trouser legs, it sprayed all over a small child nearby and even got into the player and under the CD inside it - jamming everything up. Well… drama stations,..I just screamed “POOH! all over me!!” the teachers and kids burst out laughing, the jews all screamed MAZELTOFF! And I was handed about 100000 tissues and tried to mop up. The funniest moment was when the director asked into the microphone, “There is pooh on the CD, so just pretend that there’s music playing” ya, it was gross. Disgusting stuff.
Ended up at home and sewed a really nice skirt – managed to do my denims and tracksuit too. Sigh. Everything fits now!

Thursday: No crap today. Came home early to find that a troup of vervet monkeys had ripped my weeks worth of rubbish out of the bags and thrown everything all over the floor outside my house. I wore heavy dutied gloves and while gagging, swearing and generally wishing death to all monkeys I cleaned up most of it. Sis. Then we went to my friend Kims house for coffee and cake at 7:30pm!! Got home late and talked for ages with my man.
Oh ya, washed my little black maltese Oscar at about 10:30 – he’s going in to get his goolies chopped off tomorrow morning… poor baby.

Friday: woke up early, dropped my bundle of crap, Oscar off at the vet. Came home, and now I’m typing this. We were supposed to travel into a African township tomorrow morning to take blankets to the needy people there but my husband I can’t make it because of his Saturday job ;( so instead we are dropping our blankets off at a friends house (where the spider adventure went down)
Ok gotta go.

Sands xx

Sunday, 29 July 2007

Our baby!

Our baby was gorgeous!

It was posing like it was on the beach and at one point chewed it's hand. I was totally in love from word go!

Sands xx

The Strange Attachment to Pets...

Sandy Doherty-Bigara- Monday, 9 Jul
Exerpt taken from my pregnancy chats:

Hey there! My ultrasound app is on Friday 20th - very very excited - i just want to see my little bean again! the last time was a rushed emergency appointment so we couldn't really enjoy looking at he/she. my tum is getting bigger every day! I finally found another very cool lady cynthia who's tums is just like mine :)

I'm laughing to myself - i'm lying on my back on the couch typing on my laptop - the nice thing about my tum is it holds the laptop in place! It doesn't slide down :) Well, the curry fixation remains but ended up in second place to...PIZZA! oh my hat. my darling husband is so cute - he's always happy to go along with pregnancy cravings cos he always gets a share :) my little pet hamster died last night - she was such a cutie (the hamster, 6 birds, two fish tanks and two dogs were a sign that children were sorely needed...) we came home early from church and she was dying, I got to hold her poor thing.

Isn't it wierd how we become so attached to pets? I cried for an hour afterwards cos I didn't want my dogs to die of old age one day (they're 8 months old...hormones to blame??)

Sands xx

RIP Budgie and Hamster

Sandy Doherty-Bigara - Wednesday, 11 Jul
Exerpt taken from my pregnancy chats:

Hey there! You won't believe it! I came back from my friends house last night and my favourite budgie fell dead off her perch!! I was so shocked. I feel like the local morgue assistant.. our back garden is looking like a little graveyard!
First our hamster Crumpet and now Blublu??

Shame, she was cute too - I had 4 budgies. oh well. less noise :) I can't wait till next Friday’s appointment, its all so new still - I just want to see my little bean so badly! It'll be nice to know that everything is still going well. Today was my first day with no nausea! Amen sista :) AND... I ate vegetables last night!!
I haven't been able to even look at veggies for about 6 weeks now. I made the most wicked soup ever, with fresh white bread...yum. I felt so guilty my poor hubby told me that he's been sneaking out of bed to eat raw carrots at 2 in the morning :(
I knew it was time to feed the man some veg!

I've been so bored today - I'm producing the music for a childrens musical in September, 47 tracks eek. And today I sat for three hours doing all the vocal recordings - songs like winni the pooh -SCREAM. I'm so over these songs already and still have three months of rehearsals to go (ay ay ay) anyway...

Sands xx

Eating WAY too much

Sandy Doherty-Bigara fri 13 july
Exerpt taken from my pregnancy chats:

Yesterday was baaaad as far as food goes. I went to a restaurant with the old ladies (mom gran and aunt) and ordered a welsh rarebit (its a toasted bread with banana and bacon on top with a thick cheese sauce over it - then grilled till it's crispy yum!!) The waitress was winking her eye at me and smiling - when they brought the plate there was like three times as much as usual on the plate!!
I couldn't finish it all ( i tried tho ;) only afterwards the waitress told me that she knew me because i went there so often last year, and she told the kitchen staff that i was back and pregnant! so the chef made a triple order as a gift.
i nearly popped! After that we went to another restaurant and I had a huge scone with creamand jam. this thing was massive, like 10cm across! as long as my hand! I nearly died. My hub ate the left overs later at home :)
I got home and had some bread and then made a big pot of soup. Needless to say I was so uncomfortable last night, felt like a balloon. oh ya, we got all nesty and attacked our spare room throwing out so much stuff! now at least we can get inside it to start setting up for baby!

Sands xx

That Spider Adventure

Sandy Doherty-Bigara sat 14 july
Exerpt taken from my pregnancy chats:

Hey there, i'm feeling so terrible- I decided to cook cottage pie - mince with mashed potato on top grilled in the oven. Only problem is - I made chips the other day and one must've fallen under the grill cos the kitchen is filled with wierd smelling potato smoke! ugh. Hope I can eat dinner now :(
on a lighter note: I have had the best weekend ever! last night we went to my mad friend Cristine and her hub Ryans house up in the mountains - Botha's Hill (really cold!!)
we had a HUGE dinner and way to many choc brownies and then played some video games, I lost -shamefully - and blamed the pregnant porridge brains... well, we were all sitting around and in true africa style a HUGE spider came into the house. This thing was like half as long as my finger and covered in a fine blue fur, with red feet! we laughed cos it looked like a spiderman tarantula! well, you can imagine the drama of getting this thing out of the house!
I had my camera with me and i filmed the whole thing, it is possibly the funniest thing i've ever seen! Four adults screaming like babies. My friend Cristine threw it out of a plastic container and then thought that it landed back on her so she ran screaming back into the house, my pants fell down around my ankles (post-dinner unzipped...)her hubby fell over backwards and my man was as far away fromt the ''spider'' as he could be. it's so funny!
And then today I was a VIP guest at one of the hugest airshows in Africa, my dad is a pilot and airplane mechanic and owns an aviation business. It was so nice being spoiled with hectic catering and loads of free drinks (orange juice for me i'm afraid) I saw fighter jets screaming overhead and 747's flying so low I could see the pilot! My hub could't come so we were given VIP passes for tomorrow too :)
I even managed to eat a lamb bredie (soft yummy lamb with a thick juicy tomato based sauce - eaten by the cape-coloured people - a stunning dish.

Sands xx

Poor Little Tilapia

Sandy Doherty-Bigara - Saturday, 28 Jul
Exerpt taken from my pregnancy chats:

My friend Janelle told me that she ate a tasty tilapia... Poor little tilapia... let me tell you the story.......
once upon a time,... ok ok. i'll just tell it.

My hubb and I (when just married) had a fish tank and every few weeks we'de go to this forest place where there is a river and a lake to catch small shrimp and guppies to feed to our big fish as a treat. Well one week we came home and emptied the shrimpies etc into the tank and after a bit we noticed a reeeeeeeally wierd lookin one.

Seriously - it was just eyeballs and a tail. too cute :)
We didn't know what kind of fish it was and it was half the size of a finger nail so we thought - well if it survives we'll keep it. um,...ya. Lenny the fish grew to about two full hand lengths and just as wide, he turned out to be a red breasted Namibian Tillapia. He was GORGEOUS!
He was covered in Gold and green scales with a bright red tum and he was smarter than most dogs. He even played hide and seek in his big tank - he'd hide a blue marble (his fave) and then 'look' for it for ages. When he found it he'd act all surprised and swim around like a king with it sticking out of his mouth :) he also knew us by face and when we came home he'd go nuts all excited to see us. cute.

One day - I nearly freaked. He jumped out of the tank while we were out. we were gone for a few hours and when we came back he wasn't there. I just screamed and shut my eyes cos I didn't wanna see him dead. He was on the other side of the room on the floor STILL ALIVE! He lost almost all of his scales and looked like a hiroshima victim for a few months shame! apparently they can survive out of water for ages because they jump from pool to pool so have to flop around till they find one. He didn't find one in our lounge ;)
I loved that fish - he was a legend. we had to sell him though and he's now living in a sanctuary and doing well he's about 5kgs now! Ja, shame on you all my fish killin' friends !! :) oh yes, facebook.... just go to and sign up - it's really quick and then search for me Sandy Margetts Doherty-Bigara - i'll come up and you can see all of my photos of my house dogs etc. it is such fun! much better than myspace :) ok gotta go . bye!!!!

Sands xx

Friday, 6 July 2007


We have what you would call, a monkey infestation…they come when you are least expecting it and raid gardens, houses and kitchens while you hover petrified in your room…at least that’s what happens at other people houses...

At our home we are well equipped with anti-monkey apparel – namely: Fish tank gravel, some small stones, a knobkerrie (walking stick) and a school whistle. You see, monkeys are clever little imps and if you make your home an uncomfortable place to be then they will eventually start finding lesser prepared individuals to unleash their impish destructiveness upon…

This is how it usually goes…we hear a screeching monkey or hear the sound of rubbish bin lids clashing to the floor followed by the bellowing of our miniature Maltese/French and the psychotic screams of our fox terrier as they scramble to “catch-a-monkeys!”
My husband usually follows onto our porch running like a warrior with his wooden knobkerrie and a pocketful of gravel – the monkeys know him by now, and usually head off in every direction climbing trees, bushes, walls, flinging themselves into fresh air only to come crashing down into the nature reserve next door. He then slings a hand full of the small gravel at the wall or at a tree – the sound of the gravel frightens them and they disappear like smoke. We’ve had some really great laughs.

The Juvie (teen) monkeys are the best, they are so lanky and still don’t have any courage – they follow the whole monkey-see monkey-do adage and follow such predictable patterns of escape that if we were not law abiding citizens we could probably get rid of the lot in an hour of pot shooting!
The mothers and babies are sweet but possibly the most dangerous – mom’s don’t even think to attack if their young are in danger.
The big males are the most annoying, they think themselves to be gods of a sort and parade around looking back over their shoulders as though we are riffraff! I’ve found that the only way for me to get rid of them is to blow my whistle – the sound is very shrill and they don’t like the noise. If I try to throw things at them or run with the knobkerrie then they chase me!

So anyway, for now when they arrive in legions (usually when my husband is just gone out – don’t tell me they don’t watch us!) I just shut all the windows and blow my whistle at them from the back door. They must think I’m one hell’uv’a soprano ;)

Oh yes, and it's only two weeks to go till we have our second ultrasound - very excited to see our little bean again - hopefully it wont be sleeping this time :)

For now,

Sands xx

Sunday, 24 June 2007

My dog woes...

My little black maltese cross french poodle is driving me nuts....

Sure, he's as cute as a burmese python but he's really a little on the hyper-active side of things.

For instance, he is black with curly hair...and right now as I type he is sleeping curled up in a pile of budgie seeds. This means there will be an unavoidable 'hansel&gretel style' trail of seeds that will undoubtedly weave their way through my home. Possibly into my bed. Where I will find them stuck to my thighs like a constellation, at two in the morning when i am on the loo... Again, because I am pregnant.

He has also developed this nasty habit of whining from 6-30am until we get up at 7. I never realised how loud a 2kg dog could be. when i bought him he could barely walk. We've been duped. sigh. but we love him.

Our other dog Skip is a real star, she was a rescue dog - we rescued her at 6 moths old, from quite horrible living conditions. When we got her she had no idea what her name was, nor had a clue what we wanted when we called her to us. If anyone spoke to her or looked at her she would run into her little tent bed and stay there. Now at 2.5kg's heavier she is the most amazing pup.

She knows so many commands - even ones we have not taught her like:

"Who's at the door? Who's there?"She runs to our front door.

''Where's Daddy?'' She runs to wherever he is and then runs back to me - even if he is in another room.

''There's a cat outside!'' She runs outside and looks out to the left of our garden where ''Jaunty'' comes from.

She also remembers signals like sit and down and performs them even from across a room.

Her lifes ambition is to catch a black cat that we have named ''Jaunty'' who torments her by walking along our fence each day. My only gripe is that Skip wants to dig her way to China. She has dug such deep holes that I could out my entire leg inside! Would'nt want to fall into that.

Well. For now I will continue my training with the Whining Seed-Meister and Diggy-Diggerson. count to 10...

sands xx

A pregnant jazz singer??...

Well, a couple weeks ago I stumbled into nino's coffee bar with my friend kim and my arrival coincided with the arrival of my friend Tony's Jazz Band... After a very strong cup of Nino's best I sang two numbers with the band. It was so awesome! I'm used to singing with less than pro sound, with children, with family and with competitors so it was stunning to just ... sing.

Well, I'm sitting here typing my new blog post, i'm two months pregnant and i have been asked to sing with them again at another restaurant. I can't wait! I'll be 'that pregnant chick who sings with Tony' I dig.

I've always had a soft spot for the jazzy numbers and this band is really tight, they've played together for years and they just flow!

I'm so excited!!

sands xx